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alzheimers, alzheimers advocate, alzheimers caregivers, alzheimers music, alzheimers music festival, dementia

Image Source: morguefile
I’ve seen a couple of posts this week that have really touched my heart. Allan Vann and Vince Zangaro are on very similar, yet different paths. One of the things they have in common is their willingness to share their stories to raise awareness and bring hope and comfort to other caregivers.
Allan Vann
Allan Vann is a talented blogger who has published hundreds of insightful, informative articles on his blog. He also recently began writing a column for the Huffington Post and was interviewed by CBS news last week.
Allan’s wife, Clare, was formally diagnosed with younger onset Alzheimer’s at age 63, but had been experiencing signs for several years before that. Allan cared his wife at home before making the difficult decision to place her in a care facility. However, he learned that doing so allowed him to be her husband again, rather than her 24×7 caregiver, which was a true gift to both of them.

Image Source: CBS News
The CBS interview captures the pain of slowly losing a loved one to Alzheimer’s with a raw, emotional accuracy.
Although it was my mother rather than spouse that I lost to this horrid disease, so much of what Allan says rings true to me. The arguments were the most difficult – early on, we fought about everything, and that was so uncharacteristic of our relationship. So sad to think about it…
Read more and watch the Allan’s interview here.
Vince Zangaro
Vince Zangaro was just 29 when his father was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s ten years ago at age 62. He & his wife, Amy, are full-time caregivers and by sharing their journey, they help others to stay afloat.
Vince had a wonderful piece published on The Caregiver’s Voice this past week. One of the things that makes it unique is that Vince wrote it from his father’s perspective.
When I open my eyes in the morning, I feel scared. Where am I? Where have I been? Do I know this place? I look to the right, and the people there are sleeping soundly. I can’t remember who they are, but I know they love me and I love them; I feel safe.
In some ways, Vince’s posts and his videos make me miss my mom even more, but mostly they remind me of all the happy times we shared even as she fell further into the clutches of Alzheimer’s. His words also illustrate how having a loved one with Alzheimer’s changes our lives, and how that often results in us becoming better human beings.
One of his recent Facebook posts provided a simple, yet invaluable tip, in such a heartwarming way.
“I have learned when giving dad a hug to have it last a minute or longer. After the 60 second mark you will start to see him grasp the moment. It doesn’t always take medicine to help someone you love.”
And then there’s this video that makes me smile and cry at the same time… if it was possible to make a 3-minute video that defines love in its truest form, this is it.
Vince is also founder of the Alzheimer’s Music Fest which you can read more about on Facebook or at the event website. If you’re in the Duluth, GA, area, check it out!
Thank you for sharing these people and their experiences, Ann. My mother-in-law sinks deeper into memory loss–which is not surprising at nearly 100 years old–but I find it brings up many of the feelings I had around my own mother as she receded because of dementia. So far, my mother-in-law has become sweeter rather than more angry (she couldn’t get much angrier than she was), so this has been a positive outcome. As always, we’ll see what happens next.
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I find it fascinating how the disease manifests itself so differently in each person; of course, that’s also what makes it such a challenge. I’m glad your mother-in-law seems to be kinder and more peaceful than she once was. I suppose if one were looking for a silver lining, that might be it. Thanks for reading and sharing your thoughts, Elaine. The caregivers in this piece are truly inspiring.
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