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The Long and Winding Road…

~ An Alzheimer's Journey and Beyond

The Long and Winding Road…

Category Archives: Guilt and Regrets

Being the Squeaky Wheel

24 Thursday Jan 2013

Posted by Ann Napoletan in Blogging, Caregivers.com, Finding a Facility, Guilt and Regrets, Neglect and Abuse, Tips

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As caregivers, we do what we have to do; unfortunately, that often requires us to be the squeaky wheel clamoring for some grease.

I just heard another story this week that drives home the importance of being an advocate for your senior. My friend’s mother, who has dementia and cannot communicate, developed severe symptoms a few days ago prompting the nursing home to transport her to the hospital.

Once there, they began running tests to determine what was going on. The medical team kept coming back to one particular diagnosis, but my friend just didn’t think the pieces added up. She pushed for the doctors to check a few other things, and sure enough, the initial dx was incorrect and would have required an entirely different course of treatment.

Thankfully, my friend’s mother had someone there to advocate for her and to raise questions when things didn’t seem quite right. Docs do their best, but they’re not perfect. You know your loved one better than anyone, so when what you’re hearing doesn’t make sense, speak up. The worst that can happen is that you’re wrong, but at least you will have expressed your concerns.

The same holds true for long-term care. The only way to make sure your loved one is receiving proper care is to remain involved. Ratios in traditional style facilities are ridiculous, and in a business where nobody should be “cutting corners,” it happens all the time.

My latest piece on Caregivers talks more about this topic.

Click here to check it out —> Caregiving 101: Be the Squeaky Wheel.

Remember that everything isn’t always as it seems on the surface, and changes are bound to occur over time. Staying on top of things day in and day out will help to ensure quality care, as well as lessen your chances of having regrets or guilt down the road.

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Quick Monday Update

29 Monday Oct 2012

Posted by Ann Napoletan in Blogging, Books, Caregivers.com, Falls, Guilt and Regrets, Mom

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Mom was in a grand mood on Friday when I stopped to see her before heading out of town to visit my dad. I thought I was one heck of a comedienne – had her laughing out loud! Then I walked into the other room for a minute, and she kept laughing. Heh. I guess I can’t take credit.

Sounds like she had an okay weekend. Susie said she has been very unsteady on her feet, which is disconcerting. The good news is, her room is now completely free of furniture other than the bed, making for more walking space and less things to hit her head on.

I took the photo below after work today; she was sound asleep and barely moved when I gave her a kiss. She looked so sweet.

Today’s Caregivers post is a follow up to last week’s caregiver guilt piece:  Check it out —> here.  The Four Agreements, by Don Miguel Ruiz, isn’t just for caregivers. It’s a great read for anyone needing to level set and find some perspective in this crazy life.

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Battling That Monster Called ‘Guilt’

22 Monday Oct 2012

Posted by Ann Napoletan in Blogging, Caregivers.com, Guilt and Regrets

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Today at Caregivers, a post on the topic of caregiver guilt. Constantly feeling like you aren’t doing enough? Can’t live up to the expectations you’ve set for yourself? I hope to hear feedback from others on how they deal with similar feelings. Check it out –> here…

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