
For the first time in a very long time, I just don’t know what to say…
19 Wednesday Dec 2012
Posted in Mom, Saying Goodbye

For the first time in a very long time, I just don’t know what to say…
19 Wednesday Dec 2012
Posted in Inspiration, Mom, Quotes, Saying Goodbye, Smiles
A particular Ralph Waldo Emerson quote comes to mind when I think of how many lives my mom touched during her 76 years on this earth. It’s so fitting.
“To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and to endure the betrayal of false friends. To appreciate beauty; to find the best in others; to leave the world a bit better whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition; to know that even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.”
I received this very special message the other day, and I have to say that when my time comes, I can only hope someone will feel this way about me. The experiences explained below took place 40+ years ago.
Dear Ann,
First I would like to express my sympathy on the loss of your Mother and friend. Thank you for posting the blogs and sharing so much with us.
I feel compelled to share a few memories of your mom in her much younger years. I first met your family when I worked at the Fruit market across the street from your Dad’s dry cleaning business. I was 15 when I started working there. I am not sure how old your parents were but they were younger than my parents and so much more fun.
Your Mom enjoyed life, had a wit that made me laugh, and was so smart. She also had a little girl that she loved dearly and I had the privilege of babysitting her (you). We became friends and I became part of your family and I loved it. I had many delicious dinners at your house. We played games and went for boat rides at Moraine. They knew my boyfriends. And you were the most awesome little kid. You were so loved by both your parents.
Your Mom could say things to me that my mom could not. As a result, she became a mentor to me. I can attribute much of my success and values to her. It is good for a teenager to be friends with someone who can say “That was stupid” or “What are you thinking?” She encouraged me to go to college and have a career when I couldn’t think past tomorrow. She was wise!
Our friendship continued until I moved to West Virginia, at the age of 22. I’m not sure when you moved to Columbus.
I now teach and work with teens. I am not as witty as your Mom, but I have the honor of saying to many of them “That was stupid” or “What are you thinking?”
I guess what I am saying is I am part of your Mom’s legacy and the people I come in contact with are too. Never underestimate the power of words, actions, friendships, and most of all love. I believe that God put your Mom on this earth at this time to do the job she did so well, both in her healthy years and the not so healthy.
Job well done, Marilyn! Now you can rest in Peace!
19 Wednesday Dec 2012
Posted in Mom, Ruminations, Saying Goodbye, Support system, Uncategorized
Ran some errands today, picked up a few things for Mom’s Celebration of Life. Jess also talked me into making some pizzelles. We had two irons going, so it didn’t take long and I’m glad she suggested it; otherwise, it’s very unlikely I would have made them. Brought back memories of the last time Mom helped us – here at my house in 2009. She was living at Outlook Manor at the time. I remember she sat down right away and knew just what to do, but lost interest quickly. Smart woman – she decided she’d rather eat the cookies than press them. (((smile)))

One of my all time favorite photos – Christmas Eve – Good Ol’ Days
Tonight we sorted through a huge pile of photo albums and pulled more to be scanned for the slide show. I thought we were done until Jess found another huge tub of albums I had forgotten about. Perhaps we’ll get through those tomorrow night and then I can start pulling some jpg’s together.
I am vacillating between being overwhelmed and thinking we have everything covered. And, to be honest, what I’d like to do is just curl up with my favorite blanket for the rest of the winter. Probably a good thing we have so much to do, actually. I’m also extremely thankful for Jess at this time. She’s been staying here at the house, and that has been more of a comfort than I expected.
It’s odd because I usually love my solitude, but not so much at the moment. On the other hand, I really don’t want to be around or even talk to other people right now. Hard to explain. I don’t even really understand it myself… to be honest, the idea of Mom being gone doesn’t even feel real.
Social worker from Kobacker House called today. I guess someone from the “bereavement team” will be calling soon. Their services are available for up to 13 months. I haven’t decided yet whether I’ll take advantage or not…
One thought that keeps running through my head is something a friend said a couple of days ago. Maybe God called Mom home at this time so that she could help comfort the precious babes from Sandy Hook Elementary. When I close my eyes, I can almost envision that – she loved little ones so much. The thought brings me some measure of peace. Just to think of her healthy again and wearing a big smile on her face… surrounded by those sweet children.
The Dispatch ran the obituary today, and I believe it will be in the Butler Eagle tomorrow. I’m pleased with the way it turned out. I had written it while sitting at Kobacker House the night before she passed…
Here are some more of my favorite photos from happier times.

Being silly – 1986

Another favorite Christmas image…

Mom’s retirement hot air balloon ride. She’d always wanted to do this, and I’m so glad we didn’t put it off…